Conflict: Is it really necesary?

Conflict. It has existed throughout the years of humanity. It still exists now, primarily because it is in the blood, of we humans, the warmongers. It will still cary on its legacy, even when we are long gone, our flesh and bones returned to the earth. Not a very difficult concept to grasp.

I believe most ALL conflicts are started for selfish reasons. It is evident in our daily lives. A difference in concept leads to quarrels, with either party trying to enforce their ideas on the other. Now, I believe most people would say that it all boils down to making concessions, but how much leeway can you give someone? How do you define 'enough'? Ultimately, humans are narcissisic, egocentric beings, so I can safely assume, not much. Forgive me, for sounding so jaded about humanity.

Take for example, the recent Gulf War started by our dear former American president, Mr Bush. The reason for starting the war, at face value, was to combat terrorism. However, we all know otherwise. America is probably the world's largest consumer of crude oil. And Iraq i rich in crude oil. See the link?

This second example is on a personal level. I type the following part of this post with a heavy heart. For the last time I raised a conflict, it indirectly cost a friend his life.

It happened, close to two years ago, when I was still serving my national liabilities. Most people should be familiar with the term 'Sentry Duty'. A personal conflict arose between the Duty Orderly Sergeant (DOS - the bugger gave me 8 hours of sentry duty for the day.) and myself, so I deserted my sentry post in a fit of rage. I've never forgiven myself for doing that, till this day. Due to my selfish and thoughtless action, our book-out timing was delayed for almost two hours, with the supervisor giving a lecture on why we shouldn't desert the sentry post unnecessarily. Less than 4 hours after I got home, I received a phone call from a colleague, informing me that my fellow NSF was involved in a car accident on the way home.

Subsequently, he passed away, without waking up from his coma.

All that went on in my mind were "what if"s. What if I hadn't deserted my duties. He'd probably still be alive and well. What if I had been a little more accomodating? We probably wouldn't have had our book-out time delayed, and he probably wouldn't have met up with that fateful accident. Of course, all these, are just hypothetical. However, I still can't shake the fact off, that I was the indirect cause of his death.

To this day, I still think twice, thrice, four times even, whenever I feel that the anger is about to approach the limits. That one incident, is, and will forever be, a painful reminder to myself, branded onto the mind and soul.

I have the blood of an innocent on my hands. Will you risk the same thing, over a selfish reason?

On a side note, wish all my friends and classmates good luck for the coming mid terms! Let's all work hard together. :)

EXTRAS:

A comical, albeit vulgar video on how to handle conflict. :)

Valentine's Day: A day of love?

Just something interesting I heard from a friend...

"14th February, a day to suck lovers' blood dry."

If you go back and think about it, that statement does make sense. In my opinion, the contemporary Valentine's Day has had its original meaning, somewhat tainted. In the past, lovers used to write... Well... love notes... To each other, maybe with a bouquet of flowers, and some handmade confectionery. It was a simple affair, sincere, and close to the heart. Now, it is but a commercialised and overhyped event. Unscrupulous merchants make use of this day to viciously mark up the prices of their merchandise, anything ranging from confectionery, to flowers, to V-day cards. Everything's over-priced, on V-day. Even a plain, not-so-eye-catching rose can cost you anywhere from $15 to $20 a stalk. It's the day where all the posh restaurants are full house, with a mile-long queue of patrons. You wouldn't even be able to get a table if you didn't make a reservation a few days in advance. Okay, I exaggerate. But the main point, is that, such a romantic day, being exploited to such an extent... Just thinking about it, makes me sick.

V-day is the time of the year, where the ladies expect the guys to spend a little more time, money, and, more importantly, shower a little more love on them. Most people would probably think that nothing's wrong with it, V-day comes only once in a year, anyway. Some people actually have a misconception that the more money you spend on V-day, the more evident your love is for the significant other. However, I think it's the thought that counts. I'm sure any significant other would appreciate what his/her partner has done for him/her, no matter how insignificant the cost.

I think too much emphasis is placed on V-day itself. Any other day can be V-day, as long as love exists between a couple. I mean, why wait for V-day to express your love for the other party? You can easily say those 3 words to your loved one(s) any day of the year. That, I think, is much more romantic, rather than doing it on V-day itself.

Kinda similar, to Father' Day, or Mother's Day, no?

Extras:

This video kinda provides high entertainment value... Haha.

First impressions count?

"Don't judge a book by its cover", the saying goes. I always found it amusing, that such a wise saying, is always contradicted by the shallow mindset of people, in general. Just a disclaimer though, i'm not implying that i'm not guilty of judging by appearances. I admit, I sometimes do, (I'm very partial towards sharp facial features. Okay, i'm shallow.) but tell me, who isn't guilty of such?! It's only human to do so.

Generally, a stereotype is established in the minds of people, just by first appearances. Picture this; you were attending an important job interview, and you dressed down for such a formal event. Dressing sense might not really be what you are, but potential bosses tend to hire employees based on first impressions. A negative image of a sloppy worker should have already formed, by the time you knock on the door and enter the interview room.

First impressions, depending on the situation, may facilitate, or hamper your progress in human relations. Just a random fact: my current best friend and I were at loggerheads with each other for two years, during my upper secondary school life. I first thought of him as a sloppy person with his disheveled hair, and the snide tone of his words, suggested that he was quite the sarcastic. The mere sight of him irked me. This negative image persisted through the high school years, until, coincidentally, we were enrolled in the same junior college, and the same class at that. Oh well... Might as well make the best out of it, right? Then I discovered that he wasn't such a bad person after all. Had I been less shallow, i'd have earned myself a best friend much earlier, no?

A person's body language also contributes to how others may perceive him. For example, people can attribute certain behavioral patterns, from the way you walk. If you slouch, others tend to think that you lack self-esteem. Conversely, if you walk with a swagger, people will think that over-confidence is second nature to you. It's not easy to please people, is it...

First impressions count to some extent, in my honest opinion. However, we humans tend to judge by outer appearances, often, regrettably neglecting the personality(inner beauty), the bigger and more important aspect of a person.

So. Will you let personal prejudice get in your way, the next time you make a new, prospective lifetime buddy? You decide.

Extras:

As always, a video for your viewing pleasure. :D